Marriage...good until you start talking about debt!

Geez.  I mean I have only been doing this blog/debt reduction thing for two days and already we have got into a fight about debt.  Debt does cause division for sure.  

Our problem in our marriage is this:  "B" wants me to happy so he wants me to have everything I ever wanted, even if we can't afford it.  I want to have everything even if we can't afford it.  Geez.  Does that make since at all?  Well, in our insecurities and downfalls it does.  You see...I want stability and to feel well taken care of and "B" (as any man does) wants to feel like he has completely taken care of and protected his woman.  The problem is...it's twisted.  

Even though I have gotten pretty much anything I want (in reason), it hasn't given me what I truly wanted.  I want to be fully taken care of as far as savings for our future, savings for the kids, and so forth.  I want to look at our money and be happy and secure that it's there so if there was anything I wanted that I could bring it home and know that it's paid for.  I can name several things that are paid for and I love them even more because I know that it's paid for, it's mine, I don't owe anything to enjoy it.  

So, we are having to redo our reactions towards each other and our insecurities.  "B" has got to stand up to me.  He has got to know what truly protects me.  A man has to protect his family from any evil (in reason) and to me debit is evil.  To give me what I want is nice (and I'll probably not get any more presents for a very long time!!) but it's what I desire.  I desire to be secure in our finances.  I need to not pressure him into keeping up with the Jones'.  I can't do it.  I don't want to do it.  Not right now, but I promise you...when our finances our happily in their place...I will feel like the Jones'.  :)